A cluttered room is more than just a collection of disorganized things. The things you have around you are a direct reflection of what is going on inside you. A tangled web of thoughts, feelings and sometimes even shame. Understanding and coming to terms with your inner dialogue is key to also getting clarity in your thoughts.
In this article, we'll go through what you can do to gain more clarity of thought by daring to look at the inner dialogue you constantly have with the stuff around you.
Imagine the following scenario:
You walk into a room full of piles of paper, clothes thrown across the floor. Every surface is cluttered. When you first walk in, it just looks like a messy room. But when you dig a little deeper, it's a battlefield of emotions and thoughts.
Perhaps you feel a strange sense of security in this chaos. Leaving the mess where it is can sometimes feel like a comforting blanket. The mess protects you from what could happen if you started pulling things and stirring up all the emotional turmoil.
We are good at convincing ourselves that we do have "order in the chaos" and that we know where everything is. Some even want to claim that they need "a creative chaos" around them in order to be creative and productive. When other people see a mess, you see an intricate code system that only you can underständ.
But deep down you know that's not true. You know it's a facade and a coping mechanism for getting too overwhelmed by the thought of starting a cleanse.
Anxiety and overwhelm
Every day the clutter piles up even more, and with it the cluttered thoughts that don't get the space they need. The weight on the shoulders gets hevier and hevier. Everywhere you look in the room you get anxiety. The clutter can remind you of feelings that your mind is cluttered, that you aren't able to do what you want, decisions that you haven't been able to make, the feeling of being a failure. You will never succeed in reaching your goals and dreams. The clutter is a physical representation of your mental state.
Procrastination
Every day the room gets messier and you end up feeling helpless and out of control. You tell yourself that tomorrow, or next week when you have more time, then you can start tackling this. But the day never comes.
If you procrastinate on one thing, it usually means you procrastinate on other things too. This leads to a procrastination cycle and downward spiral:
You procrastinate tackling the mess > you feel worthless for not getting things done > which leads to you procrastinating even more etc.
It's no wonder you feel overwhelmed. This spiral leads to you feeling even more worthless, feeding the mind with ideas that you will never succeed at anything and will never be able to change. After a while, the inner dialogue becomes so loud that you find it difficult to sleep, which in turn leads to you not being alert at work, etc. The clutter in the home eventually becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy and an obstacle that stands between you and your goals and dreams.
The golden nugget: a clear inner dialogue
Beneath all the layers of physical and mental clutter lies a golden nugget. And that golden nugget is that you have a desire to achieve your goals and dreams that you have set for yourself.
But to even find your way back to what it is you dream about, you need to clear the space to be able to hear your thoughts without noise. And as long as you have clutter surroundings, your thoughts will be occupied with irritation and anxiety, and you will have no room left to deal with any dreams.
I hear what you're thinking. You may be longing to get your stuff in order and some peace and quiet in the chaos of everyday life. A single cleared surface on which to place the grocery bags. But when will you have time to create that order? In the current situation, that wishful dream seems far away.
You are your own mental archeologist.
You have accumulated everything you own for a reason. Getting rid of half of the stuff you own is not something you would think possible, even in your wildest imagination.
But there's a reason your home has gotten so messy. 20% of decluttering is about clearing the actual physical stuff. The rest is psychological. It's about untying all those mental knots and letting your inner dialogue - disappointment, fears, doubt, and uncertainty - get a chance to surface and get out in the open.
Your true self is buried under all the clutter. When you start digging, you can feel like an archaeologist digging through layer after layer of psychological crap you've accumulated. But eventually, you will find yourself.
How do you start this excavation then?
It starts with you deciding once and for all that you will have the courage to confront whatever comes up. You need to start questioning this " comfort blanket" of ideas and beliefs that you don't have the time and energy. Your inner dialogue will soon become clearer and clearer, and you can clearly see how to make your dreams come true. But as long as your mind is cluttered with junk, you won't see the dreams that are down there somewhere, buried under all the junk.
Give yourself the chance to listen to your inner dialogue
It is not easy to start decluttering. But the question is whether it is even harder to live in chaos every day. I want you to give yourself the chance to listen to what your inner dialogue is really about. What is it trying to tell you?
Start weighing the temporary discomfort of starting to declutter against the constant chaos that you find yourself in. Then there is no logic to why you allow yourself to live this way.
When you clear your stuff, you also create a space for your mind to rest and get some peace. For every thing you decide to get rid of, you also get rid of old ideas and beliefs. You are also doing yourself the favor of creating a future filled with unimagined possibilities and clarity of thought. The feeling that you have succeeded and peace of mind.
Finally, you can breathe again.
Roll up your sleeves and get started.
Take one thing at a time.
Maybe the clutter is far too loud at first. But with each item you decide to get rid of, the roar will get quieter and quieter. After a while you can finally hear your thoughts.
You can get help.
I'm Theresa and I'm a professional organizer. I coach private individuals and entrepreneurs to come to terms with the physical and digital chaos in order to be able to focus and save time, energy and money.
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